61 - Enneagram Series Part 3: The Heart Triad (Types 2, 3, 4)

In this episode, Annaliese and Alan explore Enneagram Types 2, 3, and 4, focusing on their similarities and differences. Annaliese unpacks each Type’s core fear, desire, strengths, struggles, and the key message they need to hear. She explores how understanding these Types—even if they aren’t your own—can help you live more authentically as you, and build deeper connections with others.

You’ll hear about:
- How each of the 9 Enneagram types has a distinct perspective on life and how paying attention to other viewpoints can expand your understanding.
- The Heart Triad (Types 2, 3, and 4) is highly focused on identity, belonging, and significance, with each type feeling life is about understanding others: Type 2 seeks to meet others’ needs, Type 3 is concerned with how others perceive them, and Type 4 wants to stand out as unique.
- Each type in the Heart Triad struggles most with their feelings of shame. Type 2 often feels others' emotions more than their own (shame about their own needs), Type 3 dismisses their feelings to stay productive (shame about not performing perfectly), and Type 4 overidentifies with their emotions (shame about feeling like they don't belong).
- Noticing how these Types handle stress can help you manage your own tendencies more effectively and live with greater balance.
- Each Heart Type relates to others based on how they relate to themselves: Type 2s want to be indispensable, Type 3s want to be valuable, and Type 4s strive for uniqueness. Recognizing this can help you better understand their motivations and behaviors.

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What the Heart Triad Teaches Us:
- All people, no matter their differences, are important and deeply valuable.
- Practicing empathy for others and ourselves builds our confidence and naturally strengthens relationships, helping us navigate life’s ups and downs.
- Building authentic relationships is key to a more satisfying life.

Ways to Use the Enneagram to Grow:
- Create a safe space for growth. Every personality trait—whether a strength, weakness, fear, or desire—offers valuable insight to help you build better habits.
- Tune in to lessons from all types, not just your own. Other types bring valuable insights that can expand your understanding of life and how you navigate it.
- Use the Enneagram with kindness. Use what you learn to grow and improve, not to judge or over-criticize yourself. Your growth is your responsibility, and the Enneagram is a tool to support that journey.

Listen in today to learn about how prioritizing relationships more and tuning in to others (and your own needs) can help you build some of the strong emotional skills you're looking for!